Anamnesis
by nesza
Summary: Where was Claire before and after RE4? Leon tells us a story of love, hope, and a hell lot of waiting. LeonClaire. A 3chapter romance. COMPLETE! if you don't like the idea of claire & carlos being linked, then don't click.
1. Lost

**Disclaimer:**I don't own anything related to RE save for my RE1-3 CD's.

Ever wondered where Claire was in all of the RE4 madness? I did. I desperately wanted to know but I had no means of contact with the developers of the series so I just made up a story of my own.

This was supposed to be a one-shot, but the story became too long for a one-shot, so I thought I'll just break it up to two or three chapters.

The flashbacks are in _italics_. There are quite many references to the past. Actually, three-fourths of the first chapter is about Leon talking about the past.

Anyway, why am I keeping you with my senseless babble? Read on…

p.s. and leave a review after.

**This fic is bound to go through another rewriting. Check back in a few weeks if you want to read the revised (and hopefully improved) version. 

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**Chapter 1 **

"Let's just leave it at that," I told the president's daughter as we escaped.

Yes, she was a part of me I can't let go. I had come to learn that there were certain things from my past that I can never let go no matter how hard I try. Ada Wong was one of them. She was there to witness the loss of my innocence, one of the things I never thought would mean so much. She was there to help me escape the horror that was Raccoon City. She helped me then, she helped me again. I nearly died twice but she was there to save me just in time.

I can never thank her enough, for because of her, I can go back. I can come back to the one waiting for me, the same person I had waited for.

* * *

"Everybody's been talking about you and the success of your mission," Agent Roberts gave me a pat on my shoulder. The old man was one of my few close colleagues.

"I got some help," I shrugged.

"No need to be humble, Kennedy. I've seen it coming miles away. You're bound to be the hero you are now."

I nodded meekly.

"Boys' night out?" Roberts asked.

I shook my head as I placed my gun in its holster. "I want to go_home_."

"Have some rest, man. Enjoy Europe as a tourist. I'm sure there will be a hefty paycheck waiting to be spent," he tried to convince me.

I knew I would enjoy a normal uneventful tour through Europe wherein there would be no chainsaw-wielding maniac after me, but I knew I would enjoy seeing **_her_** more. I needed to tell her everything I neglected to say. I had to finish what I started.

I looked at the older agent with a hint of dark weariness and determination in my eyes.

"Claire is waiting."

* * *

I slammed the phone's receiver back. I couldn't contact Claire's cellphone and had just found out from her co-worker that she had already quit her work. I noticed that people were staring at me with curious eyes. I would have glared at them if I wasn't so tired.

I picked up my bag from the floor and sat down next to Agent Roberts. "Fight?" he asked, glancing at me from the top of the newspaper he was reading.

"I would have been smiling," I shook my head.

"Your flight is in an hour, you'll see her, don't worry," he tried to help rid me of my worries.

I felt fear creep up from inside. I had fought zombies, giant bio-weapons and had gone against cults, terrorists and whatever madness technology can bring but I had never felt a fear quite like this before. If a tyrant came to pay me a visit, I can always blast the damned thing's brains out with a grenade launcher. But this one…I was weaponless in this war, threatened to be eaten whole with no means to fight. I was against time and numerous other forces impossible to battle with.

I was against time and her decisions.

The events six years ago were still vivid in my memory. It was a far too traumatic memory to easily forget. I accidentally met up with Claire in the zombie-infested Raccoon City. We helped each other to survive. I teamed up with Ada, she with Sherry. After we had escaped, I sent her off to look for her brother. I was angry then, for a reason I could not understand even until now. I thought she was being insensitive and unfair. She wanted to leave when I thought it was priority for us to stick together and help each other recover. I had lost someone already. I couldn't bear to lose anyone again. She was not to be stopped, however. Upon feeling that she was not to be deterred, I told her to leave us alone.

And that was exactly what she did.

I became her support working from the sidelines. She used to call to tell me of her whereabouts and expected me to supply her as much information as I can. I gladly helped. I was as determined to put an end to Umbrella as she was.

I heard about her escape from Rockfort Island. I learned about how much pain and horror she had gone through once more. I learned about Steve, a young man she cannot save. Hearing about him made me think about Ada and the pain I felt when I lost her. I wished Claire wouldn't have to experience that pain. But I realized that it was only wishful thinking for my part.

I received a call from her a few days after their escape. She thanked me for leading her brother to her and asked me to join their Anti-Umbrella task force. For me, the only option was to say yes.

We worked together for almost two years, doing raids and coordinating with bigger groups, asking for help. The team spent almost every day together. There was no rest for people like us. Claire and I never really spent much time together prior to being teammates but she always treated me as if I were one of her best and long-time friends. Not that I had any complaints.

The best and worst thing about joining the team was seeing Claire everyday. It was not that I had long harbored feelings for her, for I certainly did not. After our Raccoon City adventure, I had been mourning for Ada for the longest time. She had a hold in me I cannot easily let go. I had a weakness for strong, independent and mysterious women. Ada was just that.

Spending almost everyday with the team made me see the Claire Redfield without the gun and the zombies. I was able to see the many sides of Claire. I saw that she was the fearless sister who looked for her brother halfway around the world, the teenager who blasted zombie skulls with me and _so much more_.

I saw that she was _strong, independent_ and could be just as_mysterious_. She was very endearing that people just naturally gravitated towards her. I was one of them.

Came with these realizations about her were the weird unsorted feelings. They were not flat-out strong emotions. They were feelings cultivated by everyday encounters, by slowly unraveling the mystery that was Claire Redfield.

It was, however, very hard to fit those emotions in the world we were living in. We were so busy trying to destroy Umbrella. She was too eager to fight off the enemies to notice. I once thought that when Umbrella was over, we could start talking about the many things that had been left unsaid.

The chance never came. Two days after taking down Umbrella, Chris and Claire went away without so much of a goodbye.

Four years had passed since I last saw Claire Redfield. In those four years, drastic changes had occurred. Gone now was the rookie cop Leon who tried with a lot of uncertainty, but succeeded anyway, in surviving the terrors of Raccoon City. Gone was the policeman capable enough to help but weak enough to stay by the sidelines. As a member of the Anti-Umbrella task force and now as an agent, I had stared into the eyes of death countless times and walked away alive. I had risked limb and leg in doing missions for the country. I had seen too much death, horror, and corruption to be the same Leon I was six years ago.

The set-up was fine with me. I had no complaints. Life was dull...but tolerable. I was neither happy nor sad. My laughter had become mechanical and only my passion to defend set me apart from the dead.

Two months ago, I received a call that changed the course my life was taking. I received a call from my former captain, Chris Redfield. It was the first time that I had any form of communication with any of my teammates since the team had disbanded. It was an agreement not to contact each other unless extremely necessary, that way we can lessen suspicions and not give away the locations of the other members most sought-after by terrorists and other Umbrella-affiliated organizations, namely Chris Redfield and Jill Valentine.

A smile crept up my face upon realizing that with that call, a link to my past had been renewed.

"My sister is there in DC. I would greatly appreciate it if you can keep an eye on her safety. Give her a hand if you can," I heard Chris say. It was, perhaps, the only thing I really heard during the span of our conversation since my emotions were too busy doing cartwheels for me to hear what he said next.

I saw Claire again through the lenses of my binoculars. She was staying two buildings away from the address Chris gave me. It was a challenge for me to talk to her. I couldn't just show up at her door and tell her I found her through her brother because Chris had strictly instructed me never to tell her he called. I resorted, as shameful as it may be, to the good old art of stalking. Not only was she hard to follow when traffic came (because of her bike) but also, she almost never visited the same place twice. I was able to successfully bump into her a week after.

She was very surprised to see me, I could tell. She walked up to me with a big grin on her face and eyes sparkling with excitement. "Leon?" she called out.

I pretended to be surprised as well. "Claire?"

"Leon!"

It reminded me of our first meeting in Raccoon City when we had been separated by the car crash and had to call on to each other. This time, however, there were no creepy undead things crawling about and our voices were a lot more subdued.

"Leon!" she crashed into me with a hug which I found myself returning with eagerness. "I missed you."

"I missed you too, Claire."

She pulled away. "H-How are you? I—I never thought I'd see you again, I don't know what to say."

I stared. I couldn't help it. I was dumbfounded. There was an overwhelming emotion of seeing someone familiar again that kept me gawking. There were some things I immediately noticed. Her eyes…it used to scream rage and determination, but now only flickers of passion were left. If my eyes were made dull by the horrors I had faced, maybe it was the same for Claire.

"Leon, are you alright?" she nudged me a bit.

"Your hair…"

She ran a hand through her hair in an attempt to smooth away the stray ones. "I started letting it down. It's a bit creased from the helmet and—"

"It looks better," I said. _An evident touch of femininity, _I thought._ What else have changed? _

"Thanks," she smiled. "I heard you're working for the president now, you big shot!" she punched me lightly in the arm.

"Just got lucky," I said. There was an awkward moment of silence. "Umm…How are you? How's Chris?"

She looked around at the mention of her brother's name. The Redfields had these overprotective tendencies towards each other. "Chris? Err…Hey, my place is near. Let's grab some beer then we could talk," she cheerfully said. I'm glad she didn't lose her appetite for beer.

We went drinking that night. She told me about Chris and Jill, and about what she had been doing for the past four years. I shared most of what I had monotonously been doing myself all those times. She mentioned that she was going to try to get a job while she was in the city. She said she was tired of her nomadic life but couldn't do anything about it. She also told me about a few unconfirmed reports Chris got about the possibility of Umbrella affiliates chasing the two Redfields. She always thought it was just a rumor but admitted that one can never be too careful.

She was a lot different as compared to before, I could tell. Even the aura she was exuding was different. There used to be a strong, raging tiger residing inside her. I remembered her to be a bit brash, always hard-headed, free-spirited and competitive. Somehow, she seemed a lot tamer now. This got me to wonder what could have possibly tamed her…or who.

She shied away upon the insinuation of having had a lover for the past few years. I didn't push it. I doubted I could even stand to hear from her tales about another man. I have had enough of that back then with Steve.

"Stay the night, Leon. Tomorrow's not a work day," she said as she took another swig from the bottle. She was on the opposite side of the coffee table. We were sitting on the carpeted floor in her living room.

"Would it be alright?" I asked so that I wouldn't look too eager.

"Of course, the couch is all yours."

At past midnight, Claire retired to her bedroom while I slept on the couch. Had it occurred four years ago right after taking down Umbrella, I would have taken my chance with her. I would have told her of the feelings that she evoked every time she smiled. I would have gotten either very lucky…or luckless. One thing would have been for sure, though, I won't be sleeping on the couch. I would have either been in her room doing something a lot more _productive_ with my time, or walking through the streets looking for a pub to drink my sorrows away. Now, however, we were both grown-ups. We were now aware more than ever of the scars that Umbrella had left. Everything had gone more complicated. It was not the time to revive old feelings. I could not just simply pick up where I left off.

Whenever I had the time, I made sure to spend it with her. For the next few weeks, I always made sure to drop by her apartment to help her out. It was like old times again. We went out for movies, drinking sessions, we ordered Chinese take-outs, we watched football games on TV. We were like teammates again. Just like old times.

Little by little, the unsorted feelings came back. I think it never died anyway. It seemed impossible not to develop the feelings again. No one can spend everyday with her without falling for her charms.

I dreaded the day I'd be sent on a mission.

And to my luck, I was. And not just any mission, I was sent to rescue the president's daughter.

I drove uneasily the night I had been told of the new mission. I was to leave early the next day. I wondered how long the mission would take. Three days? A week? Even if it would take just a day, it was more than I was willing to give. A few days ago, Claire had given a few hints that she was leaving the city. Only God knew where she would be going this time.

She had called early that morning and told me to come by her place for dinner. She said she would be cooking. I even joked that I would order some take-outs as reserves in case she managed to burn down the kitchen. I can remember her cooking being notorious in the team. I had been polite and ate whenever she asked me to…but one can get enough of the taste of cardboard.

I knocked on the door and was greeted by Claire's mischievous smile. "The kitchen's still intact?" I asked worriedly.

She hit me in the arm and let me in. We had a wonderful dinner. Four years had drastically changed her cooking skills. She said Chris got tired of her feeding him take-outs and forced her to attend a couple of cooking seminars.

We talked in the veranda while drinking beer. Actually, she was drinking, I was merely holding on to a bottle. I couldn't show up the next day for work reeking of liquor. I didn't know why we were looking out the veranda in the first place for the view was nothing more than a secluded alleyway with a trash can in the corner and a few stretches of her neighbor's washed clothes.

We were joking and laughing when I interjected about my mission. "I was sent on a mission," I said flat out. My timing skills always fail when I'm with her anyway. I doubted I could have said it at a better time.

She immediately stopped laughing.

"I was sent to rescue the president's daughter from a European cult," I continued.

She didn't seem interested in the details. "That's, um, good. Go kick ass, I heard you're really good. Well, you're from my team, you have to be," she tried to laugh it out.

I didn't smile. It was nothing to smile about. "I'm leaving tomorrow. I'd be back as soon as I can," I said as I looked at her. She avoided my gaze.

There was a long stretch of silence. "How long?" she broke the silence.

"A day, a week. I'm not sure."

Silence again. The tension hung in the air. Suddenly, I found it difficult to breathe. I leaned onto the railing for support.

"Actually…" she began to speak again. "I…I invited you because I've got something to tell you."

I let her continue.

"I'm actually planning on…" she hesitated. "I'm leaving."

I could have sworn my heart stopped beating, so violently that its last beat almost shattered my breastbone, too long that I could have died at that moment. "When?" I managed to ask, doing my best to keep my voice level. This was exactly what I had feared. I took a drink from the bottle in my hand. I needed it. Badly.

"A couple of days from now, next week…soon," she sounded undecided.

"I was actually thinking that we--" she stopped. She moved away.

"You thought…?" I pleaded her to continue.

She looked away. "Nothing," she said.

My eyes were on her. I was looking at her so intently I could see every fiber of her hair dance with the soft whispers of the wind.

"I was just thinking we could spend the few days I'm staying, um, together," she let out a little laugh. "Not that we're not already doing that."

"Why do you have to leave?"

Of course I knew why. There were a hundred and one reasons why she should. Those reasons had been staring me in the face but somehow I was expecting her to tell me that there was no need for it at all.

_Why do you have to leave? Am I not reason enough to stay?_

She looked at me. "Why shouldn't I?"

_Because I love you…_

I searched for the words while she looked at me with questioning eyes. Would it be unfair of me to tell her I love her a few hours before I go on a suicide mission? Would it be unfair of me to ask her to stay for me when there was no assurance I could even go back? I knew how much it crushed her when Steve told her he loved her and ended up dying in her arms. Do I have the right to do that to her?

I looked down. There was silence, and it threatened to squeeze the last ounce of energy off me. When I looked at her again, tears were already streaming down her cheeks.

"C-Claire…"

She let out a suppressed whimper and before I knew it, she had begun to sob.

_What did you want me to say?_

I took her in my arms as she cried, burying her head on my chest. I didn't know what to tell her. I didn't want to see her cry but I also didn't know what to do to make her stop. She cried uncontrollably when I held her.

I wanted to tell her of the things that had remained unsaid. I wanted to tell her of the feelings and of the longing I felt for her four years ago and of the feelings that she continuously invoked in me. I wanted to tell her how beautiful she looked tonight, with her shirt complimenting her eyes and her lustrous locks shaping her face. I wanted to tell her how much she meant to me and how much it pained me not to have told her all of these.

But I couldn't. I was leaving and so was she.

I didn't know why she cried. Maybe she had been holding off the tears for so long and was able to let it out only now. Maybe she didn't want to leave but circumstances wanted her to. Maybe she was expecting me to give her a reason to stay…or maybe, a reason to leave.

I could guess all my life.

* * *

A couple of hours later, we were laughing again while sitting on the living room floor. We were never really fans of the couch.

"Can you even imagine Chris doing that?" Claire laughed.

I always saw Chris as _the man_. He was a good leader and a prime soldier. I always knew him as the person who could always take on almost anything without merely a scratch. He had a fist made of steel and patience as thin as straw. I, personally, had been a victim of the deadly duo of his fist and patience. I had been struck down to the ground by his punch. My flesh burned where he hit me. Jill was there to stop him while Claire immediately ran to my aid. That was when I learned never to mess with him. He approached me to apologize a few minutes later when he had already calmed down. We remained friends.

It was hard to fit into my idea of Chris the side of him that Claire had just shared.

"God…I miss the team," I sighed as I leaned on the couch.

"I miss the team too…" Claire said in almost a whisper. She paused then she turned to look at me, "Don't you ever wonder why **it** never happened?"

There was a change in her voice that made me realize what she was talking about.

"I wonder all the time," I told her.

"I always felt like we were more than friends, but we never really did anything about it," she looked away.

She felt it too? She always knew? I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

"You always acted like you didn't notice," I said.

She smiled and nodded, "But I always did. I didn't know how to act when I'm alone with you, so I always tried to shrug it off and act like there was nothing going on."

Her eyes were on me and I stared back. I opened my mouth to speak but my throat felt too dry to let out any word. Claire looked beautiful, her eyes made use of the dim light to sparkle, stun and render me stupid enough not to be able to formulate any coherent sentence. I didn't notice that I was moving closer to her, lessening the gap between our bodies.

I leaned closer. "Tell me, did you…feel…the same way?"

She didn't move away from my advances. "I did."

Our noses touched. "And now?" I whispered.

She closed in the gap between our lips. It was confirmed, her lips were softer in reality than in my dreams. I kissed her slowly and gently. My hand, the one that I found to be resting on her nape without my knowing managed to travel up to cup behind her ear as I kissed her more passionately.

Finally, the kiss that was four years overdue.

I pulled away to get some air. When I leaned forward again to resume, she moved away.

"What do you want, Leon?"

"I want you," I said.

She was still looking at me intently, searching my eyes for the answer she wanted. "And?"

"I want us."

Whatever it was she was looking for, it seemed like she didn't find it for when I cupped her face again, she stood up and moved away from my grasp. "When you return, then maybe we could talk about what kind of friends we are."

"Wait for my return, then…"

She gave me a little smile. "Maybe."

* * *

"Is there anything else I can give you, sir?"

I looked up to see the flight attendant beaming at me with a smile. She extended her palm towards me and gave me a tablet for my headache. "Is there anything else you want, sir?" she asked again, handing me a glass of water.

I shook my head, "no, thank you. I'm fine."

I took the medicine and drank the water. I stared at the glass in my hand and before I knew it, recollection had already invaded.

"_Here, Leon," Claire handed me a glass of water. I wiped the sweat off my forehead and took the glass from her with a thank you. I gave her the glass back after I had downed the contents and proceeded on my work again._

"_You're doing it all wrong, Leon," Claire said, looking at me incredulously. "That's why it takes you years cleaning just one window!"_

_I looked at her with a quirked eyebrow. "And I suppose you're incredibly good at this, huh?"_

_Claire motioned for me to step down the ladder and took the wiper. "Watch and learn," she said with a smirk._

_I was watching alright…but not at her self-professed incredibly dumbfounding glass panel-cleaning technique. I found something much better to look at. I always wondered why Claire always liked to parade around everywhere in her shorts. At first I thought it was just the tomboyish sporty side of her, but recently I've been wondering if there was more to it. Could it be that she enjoyed tormenting me so much? I already found it hard to breathe whenever she walked over to me with barely covered legs, but this…this was too much. She can't actually expect me to last very long in this game of hers now that her shirt was hiking up with her movements, revealing skin that was usually covered and her slender legs directly at my sight. The curve of her hips was so inviting that I had to remind myself that touching whatever I please wasn't how life works. And I knew I had to stop staring at her like a pervert if I didn't want an unsightly black eye by the end of the day. It was really a hard choice to make…_

"_Watcha doing down there? Daydreaming again?" she asked._

"_No, just thinking," I said. Of the possibilities? Oh yes, I was thinking._

"_Wow Leon, we're into a lot of thinking these days," she laughed as she tried to reach the other side of the window. It made her shirt hike up higher and I couldn't tear my eyes off the wonderful sight it made. "Leon?" she was looking at me now as if I had just dropped down and fainted. _

"_What?"_

"_Nothing," she shrugged and continued cleaning. _

"_You never struck me as the housewife type," I told her as I surveyed the living room. We had spent the entire morning cleaning up my messy house. _

"_I'm not, it's just that when you're the only girl in the house…and you have a sibling who's always playing three neighborhoods away, you learn to do house chores the fast and effective way. Here, it's finished," she said as she stepped down the mini-ladder and handed me the wiper. _

"_Thanks," I said._

_She took the empty glass of water from the side table, brushing against me in the process. I had to remind myself to breathe. "Oh and Leon," she turned to me. "Try not to be too obvious next time. I might not be so tolerant," she said with a knowing smile on her face. With that she walked away. _

_And I was left to think whether she had been planning this all along. _

A nudge woke me from my reminiscing. I growled angrily at the invader.

"Sorry, it's just that the plane's landing," a little kid who reminded me of Sherry quickly apologized. She pointed to the fastenings on her chair. "Seat belt."

* * *

I went straight from the airport to her place. I hailed a taxi and told the driver to step on it. I tried to contact her cellphone numerous times while in the cab but her phone couldn't be reached. I was running out of time…and very soon, I felt that I would be running out of options.

The elevator trip was very much excruciating. I kept thinking, what if she used the stairs to get the hell out of here? What if I missed her by a minute? What will I do if she wasn't there? All my fears built up. But then again, what will I do if she was there? How will I even start? Should I greet her with a kiss? Will she allow me to?

I started knocking on her door, gently at first. No one answered. Then the knocking got violent. "Claire? Claire!"

"What the hell do you think you're doing waking me up from my siesta?" I would have given everything for Claire to say that. Unfortunately, it wasn't Claire. It was one of her neighbors, coming out of his apartment to check just what the fuck I was trying to do.

"Have you seen Claire?" I asked.

"Do I look like the information counter to you?"

"Do I look like I'm in the mood for a joke?" I asked in a threatening voice as I stood up straight, intimidating him.

"She's gone," he said flatly.

It dawned on me, then, like a ton of cement dropped to my chest. My fears were realized. I almost choked on the pressure I felt in my chest

Once again, Claire left me.

* * *

What do you think? Please click the button below and leave a review. Thanks!

**Warning** for the next chapter: The Leon-Claire-Carlos love triangle is very much unpopular and I doubt anybody else likes it. But the thing is, I do…so expect some references to it in the next chapter. The Claire-Carlos thing won't be cheesy, or graphic, they won't even share a single romantic scene in this fic. But for you guys who find the thought of Carlos and Claire sharing something in the past nothing less than freaky, I advise you **not** to read the next chapter. If you, however, enjoyed what you've read so far and won't puke at the thought of an implied love triangle among the characters mentioned, then **please do** read the next chapter.


	2. Searching

**Disclaimer**: As you all know, I do not own any of these characters. They belong to Capcom who belongs to some billionaire I will never meet in my entire life.

I can never express in words how happy I am that the fic had received quite a number of reviews in such little time. I wasn't quite expecting such turn-out since this is my first RE fic. Thank you very much to everyone who reviewed.

I was planning to add the next chapter after a month, but the good response inspired me to write it sooner. So, this is for all of you guys.

* * *

**Chapter 2**

Disappointment, anger, frustration and regret simultaneously washed over me. She was gone. She left. Again.

"How long?" I asked him.

"Two days," he answered. "I even helped her with her things."

"Where did she say she's going?" I took a step closer to my informant.

He shrugged. "I have no idea."

"What else did she say?"

"Nothing. Just said thank you and she was gone with her bike."

"Is there anything else you're not telling me?"

"N—nothing," he said casually, obviously indifferent about the sudden surge of emotions his news brought to me. "Touch luck, eh?"

I narrowed my eyes at him before leaving. I kicked the plant box near the elevator and took off the building.

* * *

I opened the door to my house, kicking everything out of the way as I made my way to the bar. I brought out a glass and poured myself the strongest drink I can find.

I listened to my messages on the phone. I prayed that she had left a message, or even perhaps, her location. Sure enough, there was one.

"Leon, it's me. I…" I heard cars honking in the background. "I'm sorry I couldn't wait for you to come back. I can't tell you where I'm off to but I want you to know that I'll be safe."

A pause.

"I'll visit you sometimes. If ever I'll be in the neighborhood, I'd definitely call you," she paused again as if thinking of what next to say. "I'm taking your jacket by the way. I love it too much to return it. Thanks for everything…Leon."

Click.

A message.

It was everything she left me.

She had designated my job again. **'Wait.** I'll call you someday when everything became easy for me. **Wait.** Wait for me to visit, Leon. When I feel like it, I _might_ visit you. Never mind that you feel your heart shatter every time I leave without letting you know. Never mind that you couldn't sleep at night thinking of where I am and whether I am safe. Just **wait**, Leon, like you always do…'

_How many years have I waited to see you again? How many years more will you make me wait?_

I stared out the window with a drink in hand, trying to understand the situation. I tried to make up answers to my many questions. I tried to look at everything from a different perspective. I tried to justify the pain that had started to embrace me.

I tried to be fair, but fate wasn't. I asked her to stay, but she didn't. I never asked for this pain, but it came.

I threw the glass on the floor, breaking it to a hundred irregular forms of glass. Disorder was only natural, I thought.

The man who had nothing to lose just lost everything…again.

_The glass splintered where my body had hit. It gave way and I came cascading down to the harsh floor underneath. I felt too dizzy to even keep my eyes open. I felt the sharp shards of glass digging to my left palm. But no, I couldn't feel the pain where the glass broke my skin. The pain in my body was too much that I could no longer feel pain. I heard voices coming from all directions. Screams filled my ears before I passed out. _

_I woke up several hours later to see Claire, Jill and Carlos watching me intently._

"B_uenas dias, senor," Carlos greeted. _

"_Wha—What happened?" I asked as I groggily surveyed the room. White walls, machines, the distinct smell of disinfected surroundings. I was in a hospital room. _

"_You fell off the second floor," Jill informed me._

_I fell off the second floor? Did I just dream that I got shot? Falling out of the second floor in a shoot-out would not look good in my record. I felt pride give me a kick. "Did I…Didn't I get shot?" I asked, totally lost and unsure. I tried to scratch my head but found that I couldn't. I became aware that my right arm was in a cast. _

"_Oh, that too," Jill seemed to have forgotten. _

_I processed the information. That would explain the cast…and the pain in my side. I remembered that I was covering for my captain before I got shot. _

"_W--Where's Chris?" I asked, wondering where he was. _

"_In the other room."_

"_What happened to him?"_

"_Gunshot too. Where was he shot, Claire?" Jill asked._

"_Left shoulder. Below the clavicle," Claire answered without any hint of worry in her voice. _

_Jill laughed at herself, "he always gets shot, I can't keep track anymore."_

"_Is he alright?" I asked worriedly._

"_He'll live," Claire said casually._

"_That man knows his shooting but can't seem to know how to evade bullets," Jill shared. "I already got used to sending him to the hospital. I learned not to worry too much."_

"_So, that explains why you were crying so hard a few hours ago and started to profess your undying love for him after he got out of the operating room," Carlos chuckled._

_Jill turned crimson. _

"_I like you better when you had an oxygen tank connected to your body," Jill told Carlos as she gave him a sarcastic smile._

"_I'll keep that in mind." He laughed softly._

"_Hmm, speaking of…I have to make sure he's not ogling the nurses. Or better yet, the nurses aren't ogling him. See you later, Leon," she said before she rushed to the other room. _

_Carlos paced around the room, doing a reenactment of the raid. He artistically informed me of what happened while I was unconscious. Claire and I laughed so hard at Carlos that I winced in pain a couple of times because of my wound. A few minutes later, Barry walked in, acknowledged my being alive and dragged Carlos out with him. _

_Claire and I were left in the room. _

"_Now, now…where did you get that flying trick?" she asked._

_I shrugged and looked at her with a boyish smile._

_She sat beside me on the bed. _"_You could have died, you know?" there was a hint of concern in her voice. _

_I grinned sheepishly. "Yeah, I know."_

_She took my bandaged left hand, which already had hints of red. "You were a pretty bloody mess," she said as she started undoing the bandage. _

_That was when I noticed that her clothes were stained with a good amount of blood at the sides. I had a fleeting memory of hearing Claire's voice as a warm body protectively cradled me. _

_I winced when she pressed on a rather deep cut. My palm looked like an ugly map of cuts. "My hand's ugly now," I sighed. _

"_No," she said, tracing one of the longer cuts with a gentle finger. She seemed to be examining my hand intently. "This hand had saved lives. These scars are some of the most beautiful things I have ever seen."_

_My eyes remained focused on her and a smile formed on my lips. Claire can be brash and blunt sometimes, but when she was really serious, she can say things that can really strike me speechless. _

"_Well, I can't say the same for the ones on your face," she laughed softly, effectively getting rid of the serious atmosphere. _

"_Ahh…dammit," I muttered. I could imagine how bad it looked. My pretty boy looks had drawn quite a number of girls back in college, but with a number of bruises and a few cuts, I doubted it could draw even a second glance from a desperate woman. At least until it healed. _

_She laughed at my misery. "Don't worry, nobody will see it until you get out," she tried to console me. "Which reminds me…who will stay with you here, anyway?"_

"_I don't have an immediate family member anywhere near… but don't worry, I wouldn't mind locking myself alone here," I said trying to sound helpless and sad. "I'll talk to the bedpan."_

_She raised an eyebrow at me. "You know, playing cute can only work so many times." She paused for a while, seemingly at thought. "But since I promised to do charity work, maybe I can spare some time for ugly flying soldiers. Whaddya think?"_

"_My whole stay?"_

"_Afternoons only…after work and training," she bargained._

"_We can play poker," I suggested._

"_Or board games."_

"_Or watch some DVD's."_

"_I will cook you dinner," she said with an evil gleam in her eyes. _

_I swallowed hard. "I don't think--"_

"_Of course, I'm just kidding," she laughed. "I have no intentions of doing more harm to you than what you're already in."_

"_So, it's a plan then?"_

_She nodded. I smiled. 

* * *

_

I frequented her place, hoping that she had left something and had to come back for it. She didn't come back. I tried to call her cellphone everyday. It still can't be reached. I asked her co-workers for possible hints on where she could have gone. I found not a single clue. I went to various places, checking for traces of her. I called various apartment complex owners, asking if anyone matching Claire's profile had rented. I was like a little kid with a lost pet who looked everywhere and cried his way home.

Two weeks had passed and still there was no word from Claire.

My co-workers had noticed the lethargy and languor that had possessed me. I was always glum, refusing to participate in their after-work activities. Most of them easily classified me under the category_ jerk_.

I was the subject of a few weeks' gossips. Some said I became so full of myself since my successful rescue of the president's daughter and after receiving another medal. Some said my secret fiancée died. Some said I had gone deranged since my return from Europe, blaming my condition on the brainwashed creatures and the plagas. Only a few knew about Claire.

Agent Roberts was sympathetic. So was Hunnigan. She even offered to set me up with a few of her friends, it was an offer I promptly refused.

Things just cannot go back to normal after Claire. I never believed that one person can change your life permanently, it was just something you read in books. It can happen in real life, however, for it happened to me.

A month had passed. I still cannot find her. I tried to contact Chris but nobody knew where he was. I was, little by little, losing hope. Every day that passed without her seemed longer than the preceding one. I was fast becoming tired. The Higher Being had plans, though.

There had always been talk of merging teams and importing certain people for training under our division. A proposal had been approved and a few carefully and thoroughly chosen people had been recruited to form an elite team under the training and supervision of Agent Roberts.

One morning, he went to my desk and gave me a folder. "I figured you might know him," he said. "Formal training starts two weeks from now. Be sure to return him by then."

I opened the folder to see a bio data of one of his trainees. I inwardly smiled as I saw the name of the trainee in bold text: CARLOS OLIVEIRA.

* * *

I approached Carlos to ask for help. We did a lot of catching up. Carlos and I grew close while working for the Anti-Umbrella task force many years back. We were of a close age range. He continued his mercenary stints for a while after the team had disbanded and before he was offered a place in the SWAT team.

He eyed me suspiciously when I told him I was looking for the Redfields. He didn't believe that I was just randomly looking for old teammates.

"I'm looking for Claire," I finally stammered out, but not before a lot of prodding.

He nodded his head in understanding. "Four years and you're not yet over her?" he asked.

"I was, but she returned." I then told him the story. Well, most of it.

Carlos looked at me sympathetically. "How long had you been looking?"

"A month or so," I confessed.

"And you call yourself an agent of the United States?" Carlos mocked. "Look, amigo, I may not be the best there is but I've got sources."

I looked at him with hopeful eyes. He crossed his arms with an arrogant smirk on his face.

In one night, we had formulated a plan. I should give it to Carlos. He had every detail covered. The best way to look for Claire, he said, was to find Chris. Since Chris was probably cave-hopping right now, it would be an extremely stressful task to locate him. The next option would be Jill Valentine. Carlos had heard from sources, however, that Jill had quit her four-month job three and a half years ago and nothing was heard from her since. The next man to find would be Barry Burton. Barry already had a quiet life, away from all the chaos brought about by the law enforcing business. He was protecting his new and private life with his family as much as he can. He would kick our asses for tracking him down just to look for Chris and Claire. For this reason, Carlos came up with an odd but brilliant idea of seducing their nanny.

I doubted the success probability of his idea. What would a nanny know about Chris' whereabouts? I would soon be proven wrong, however.

We spent three days in Canada. Carlos would come back to our cheap two-bed motel at past midnight with an evil and satisfied grin. He refused to share the status of his mission. One morning, he just came barging in, woke me from my sleep and handed me pictures of Chris and Barry, taken pretty recently. "Call me psychic, but I think we can find him in a group of islands in Southeast Asia," he said with a smile.

Carlos dragged me to an island filled with white-sand beaches in the Philippines. Apparently, it was a bustling and busy tourist spot. He insisted we stay the night in one of the hotels there and perhaps, even attend a beach party. I was suspicious of his plans. "This looks nothing like the background in their pictures!" I told Carlos.

"Yeah, amigo, but this is just a step closer to what we're looking for," Carlos said as he checked out the scantily-clad girls.

I sighed before I dragged him to the rather secluded part of the beach. "Look, I have no idea where you're taking us, but if I don't see Claire before your two weeks are up, I'll make sure you'll have the worst time in training camp," I threatened.

"Okay, okay…" he held his hands up. "We'll take the train to the next town and we'll meet our contact there tomorrow."

I looked at him suspiciously. "A contact?"

He scratched his head. "I sort of got some help while we were in Canada."

"Tell me, where did you get the information anyway?" I narrowed my eyes.

After a few more threats, Carlos finally spit it out. He said his plan was going the right direction when Barry caught him in his home office during his search. He said Barry was furious but spared his life when he told him why we were searching for Chris. Barry said the only way to Chris' hideout was through a bandit-infested town several miles from where we were. We stayed the night and went our way early the next morning. I warned Carlos to be serious for the rest of the trip.

* * *

We were sitting quietly in the station the next morning. Most of the commuters gave us a speculative glance before they went on with their usual businesses. Far to our right, a beggar had a karaoke set-up and was singing a native song. He had a cup before him where people could drop him coins.

The weather was very humid and warm. I had to wipe the sweat off my face and neck in a rather fixed time interval. We were killing time. The next train will arrive in an hour.

I watched a young couple walk by and head to the counter to buy tickets. The girl looked about three years younger than Claire. Her black hair was tied in a pony-tail. He was holding her hand as he waited for the tickets. A smile tugged at the corner of my lips.

_I held the tickets in my hand as I waited for Claire. She said she would be running late so I had to go ahead. The movie had already run for fifteen minutes when I heard the familiar roar of her bike. She parked in front of the cinema and took her helmet off. She walked over to where I was leaning on the wall. _

"_I told you not to wait for me and go watch the start of the movie," she told me, putting her hands on her hips. _

"_I did," I joked. "But the homosexual beside me kept hitting on me so I left."_

_She let out a soft chuckle. There was silence for a moment before she spoke again. "I got scratched on my way here, see…" she raised one folded leg to let me see a rather lengthy wound coursing through her leg starting from where her shorts ended and her knee started. Thankfully, it was not at all deep. _

"_And what is the lesson we've learned from this?" I said as I shook my head, examining the shallow scratch on her leg. _

"_Never make Leon wait or else bad things will happen to you?" _

"_Well, that's one."_

"_Hmm, let me see…never think of my cute Italian neighbor while riding my bike?"_

"_What are you talking about? You don't have any cute Italian neighbor."_

"_Of course, I do."_

"_He hardly passes off as cute," I said matter-of-factly. _

"_Just because you think you're cuter than him doesn't mean he's not cute," she made a scowl. _

"_Fine. I would trust the judgment of someone who dated the high school cafeteria guy," I teased._

"_That was so many years ago!" She gripped me in the arm. "And correction, it was the cafeteria lady's son."_

"_But still…" I can remember stumbling upon one of her pictures with the guy back then. He was not at all handsome, but Claire told me that he was sweet. _

"_Yeah, whatever." She thought for a while. "Now that we're in that subject, do you think Steve was cute?" she asked._

_Perfect. First, bring up your Italian neighbor and now bring up Steve._

"_I don't know," I was immensely disinterested and I did a pretty good job letting her know._

"_Heck…we shouldn't be talking about the dead," she dropped the subject. "Do you still want to watch the movie?"_

_I got a little hint of what was going to happen next. "Why?"_

"_We're already late, why don't we just eat out instead?" she suggested. "I hope you didn't buy tickets."_

_I crumpled the tickets in my hand. "Nope. I was also actually thinking the same thing."_

"_Fine then!" she cheered. "Okay, Leon, let's see how strong you are. Do you mind carrying a wounded soldier on your back?" She brushed off the hair covering the right part of my face and gave me an innocent smile. I knew we were too old to be doing the things teenagers do, but Claire had the gift of spreading her impulsiveness and free-spirit. _

"_Do I have a choice?"_

_I was rewarded by a laugh as she clambered on to my back and held on to my neck. It was a heavy yet joyful walk to Wendy's. _

"Don't stare too long or her boyfriend's gonna kick your ass," Carlos laughed.

I looked away from the couple and sighed. That could have been me and Claire.

"What would you tell Claire when we find her?" he asked. He put his elbows on his knees and stared at his shoes.

"I'm not sure," I said honestly.

"I haven't seen her in a while. How does she look like now?"

"Beautiful."

"I was actually thinking more along the lines of she dyed her hair blue or she gained a few pounds."

"Still the same Claire."

Carlos sighed as if trying to imagine how Claire looked like now. "Heck…I miss her too," he said thoughtfully after a while.

I looked equally as thoughtful, sitting next to him in a foreign place, waiting for a local train to arrive.

"I miss the way mi chica always pushed us around to do work, her glare that could easily send paper works to completion. Her mischievous smile when she told us she screwed some things up and that Chris was looking for us with a beretta in hand," Carlos reminisced.

My lips turned up a bit.

"When we see her, make sure you won't screw it up like I did," Carlos sighed.

I was puzzled. "Huh?"

"Didn't she tell---" he closed his mouth, as if he was just in the brink of giving away a top secret.

I stared at him, demanding for the continuation of what he was about to say.

He looked away. "She didn't tell you, huh?"

"About what?"

"It was really nothing...you don't really need to—"

My gaze could kill an innocent animal in an instant and that same gaze melted Carlos' defense. He was forced to let out an explanation. "Eleven weeks after they left, I accidentally got reunited with the Redfields."

"And you didn't even tell me?" I asked, my voice treading the boundary between a subdued shout and an angry whisper. Carlos and I spent some days together after the captain and his sister left. He knew how I took those events in.

"No contact, remember?"

"Even with me?" I was immensely disappointed.

I tried to push away the feeling of anger swelling inside me. Who was I to expect everybody to be supportive of my feelings for Claire? Claire kept her whereabouts secret to me, why did I expect Carlos to inform me about it?

There was an aura of guilt emanating from him. Suspicions came to mind. "What the hell happened? Did something happen? What do you mean not screw up like you did? Is there anything else I need to know?"

Carlos looked away, "you don't need to know anything else."

I narrowed my eyes and looked away. I couldn't believe Carlos thought he could keep an information from me. I was trained to sort which information is valuable and which is utter crap. If I want to know something, I know how to squeeze it out of someone. Carlos wouldn't be an exception.

* * *

"I'm gonna check the other cars," I said after the train had started running.

"I don't think she's in this train," Carlos laughed.

I gave him an furious stare, one which he immediately understood. I walked down the aisle, making my way to the back of the train. Carlos followed me. The cargo car was a bit barer than I expected. Nonetheless, it would make do.

While waiting for the train, I already felt the awkwardness in Carlos' movements. Assumptions and thoughts raced through my mind. I could only think of one thing he would keep from me. I wished I was wrong, but there was only one surefire way to find out.

"Leon, what the hell is--" Carlos started as he closed the door.

I turned around and struck him to the ground. My fist descended on his face violently. He held on to his cheek. He tried to stand up but I pushed him to the ground. I knelt beside him and held him by the collar.

"Where?" I asked.

"Huh?"

I punched him again. "Where? Claire and Chris!"

"Europe. San Roque, small town in Spain," he coughed up.

"Why were you there?" I held his collar in a manner that could almost choke him.

He started to spit blood. "Work. Ugh. Next town. Saw Chris, he let me, ughh, stay for some time."

I felt envy and rage at his words.

"Was it good?" I asked furiously.

"What do—"

I shook him. "You and Claire! Was it good? How many nights?"

"You don't unde—"

I punched him before he could finish. "Just answer the fucking question! Was it good!" I shouted.

"Yes!" he shouted back.

I released him and foundered back to one of the cargo boxes. What did I expect him to say? Yes or no, it would have been the same. It would still hurt as hell. I collapsed to the floor. Somehow I had released the tension inside me by doing that, but it wasn't enough to ease out the pain and frustration.

Why Carlos who never even had any feelings for Claire back then? Why him who could never even stick to one woman and appreciate Claire the way I could? Why him? Why my friend? Why not just some random guy? Why not…just me?

I shook my head. "I knew it. You couldn't even keep your pants on for a day. So, Claire's on your list now too, huh?"

Carlos sat up, spitting blood out and wiping his lips with his thumb. He rested his elbows on his knees and looked at me. "It wasn't a one-night stand. Claire's different…she deserves bet--"

"The work that you were telling me?" I cut him off. My forehead was furrowed as I stared at the train floor.

He nodded. Seven weeks after the team had disbanded, Carlos offered me a job. He asked me if I wanted to join him in a mercenary stint. I refused the offer without knowing that by doing that, I refused a chance to see Claire.

I let out a pained chuckle. "That could have been me, huh?" I asked.

He nodded. "But you don't understand. Me and Claire, we—"

"It doesn't matter now."

The frustration, anger and pain that had long been waiting to be stirred finally unified. It had been pent up way too long and had finally boiled down to take a hold of me. I managed to suppress it for more than a month but I could not do anything about it now. I couldn't stop the tears from falling. I couldn't stop the pain from spreading. I could only let the tears flow down its fiery path.

I found my Claire and I lost her again.

It doesn't matter now at all.

* * *

It was already dark when we arrived. Carlos gave our contact Barry's letter and he signaled for us to climb aboard his army-type jeep. Both Carlos and I sat on the back. A Labrador was sitting on the passenger seat.

"You're looking for Chris Redfield, huh?" our contact asked in perfect English.

"Yes," Carlos said.

"It's a long and dangerous trip you've signed up to," he warned us.

"We're prepared," I said.

"Mr. Redfield isn't fond of visitors. You see, before you see him, you have to get through the boss," he said as he turned to an unpaved driveway. The jeep jiggled through the bumps in the road.

"Who's the boss?" I asked.

The man looked around cautiously before he turned to us and whispered. We leaned forward to catch what he was saying. "Nobody knows his name, but the boss is very powerful around here. He owns Redfield now. Did you bring arms?"

"Just a couple."

"Then pray he's in a good mood. He doesn't like Americans, you see," he said in a low voice. He looked around again before he made a sigh of relief and continued driving.

"I'm not American," Carlos muttered.

I glared at him. He gave me a what-did-I-do scowl.

"He hates Spanish-speaking people even worse," the man added. "We became a colony of Spain, you see, and the boss is very nationalistic. You do the math," he explained.

I smiled inwardly.

A few minutes later, we stopped at a checkpoint. A group of armed men surrounded our vehicle. The driver turned to us. "Don't bring out your weapons, let me talk us out of here," he said in a low voice. I checked for my gun but didn't bring it out. Carlos became alert too, leaning forward a bit as if to get better access of the weapon I knew he was hiding somewhere around his leg. Our contact climbed off the jeep and was escorted by one of the armed men a few paces away. They sounded like they were negotiating.

The armed men around the jeep examined us both with distrustful eyes. They talked in a language we couldn't understand, but whatever they were talking about, it didn't sound good. The dog in front started barking angrily when one of the men poked him with the tip of a rifle. They started laughing when the dog almost managed to bite the man's hand.

I took this opportunity to glance at Carlos to give him a signal. This was not a government checkpoint. These people were bandits.

The final signal we were looking for came when our contact was struck to the ground by the man he was negotiating with.

Wonderful. An ambush in the woods in a full moon. Melodramatic, I must say.

We were outnumbered but if we would be quick enough, there was a possibility we could get out of here alive. I immediately took my gun out but before I could fire, I felt a sudden painful surge of electricity travel through my body, rendering me unconscious.

* * *

"_Sometimes, I wonder what would have happened if I found my brother in Raccoon City instead of the zombies," Claire shared one time. "Maybe, then, I could have left the city and gone back to college like a normal teenager."_

_She looked out the window. "Maybe then, we could have met at your welcome party. I would have seen how you would blush when one of the lady officers hit on you," she smiled bitterly. "Then, you wouldn't even take a second glance at me and we wouldn't be talking here like this."_

_I just stared as she made a sigh, her chest rising and falling gently as she let the air out. "But then again, you could have talked to me and we could still have become good friends…even perhaps asked me out," she said thoughtfully. _

_She turned to me with a smile, the orange light outside highlighting her face. She spoke in a gentle, almost too painfully sweet voice. _

"_What do you think?" 

* * *

_

I opened my eyes to see darkness. It was pitch black. I tried to move but soon realized that I can't. I was hunched over and my chin was touching my knee. If I focus, I could see tiny slits of light. I tried to move again, but a hard object pushed at me with as much force, keeping me in the same position. I moved my foot and it resounded of an object hitting wood. It was very difficult to breathe. I kicked myself mentally when I realized where I was.

_Fuck, I'm in a box. _

I tried with all my might to break the box where I had been put. I tried kicking but I couldn't bring down any of its walls. Not without more room. I was quickly running out of oxygen.

No, I cannot die here. I did not survive Raccoon City and Los Illuminados just to die in one fucking wooden box. I struggled to free myself.

I tried pushing with my hand but I was fast becoming weak due to lack of air. I was getting dizzy. Only one thought was in my mind.

No, I cannot die here for I still have to find Claire.

* * *

What do you think?

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	3. Found

**Disclaimer: **I don't own it, so don't sue.

**Author's Note: **This is late, I know, I know… I'm really sorry that I was only able to finish it now. It was really hard to write an ending. There were so many scenes that didn't make it to the uploaded version. What you'll read here are the survivors of my crumple-and-throw episodes. Whew! Finally…the last chapter.

To the ones who were waiting for this chapter, thank my sister for bugging me all the time to finish the story.

And if you don't like the idea of Claire and Carlos being together in the past, then don't bother reading. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Read on and leave a review afterwards! Thanks!

* * *

**Chapter 3: **

_I found myself staring through a hole in one of the undead's skull. It fell to the ground in one inanimate heap. Then I shot another one of its kind. Then another one. What the fuck was wrong with these zombies? Why do they have to come in crowds?_

_There were too many of them blocking my way. My Desert Eagle was spending ammo like a machine gun._

_Click. Click. I reached to my vest for more ammo but found none. I took a couple of steps away from the creatures advancing towards me. I reached for the pocket in my leg and was rewarded with just warm space. I shook my head disapprovingly. Not good. _

_I took my knife out. Maybe if I'm lucky I could slash these things with only a few bites on me. _

_I was soon wrestling with one of four remaining zombies, trying to drag him away from the other three so as to avoid being swarmed to death by the foul creatures. I was having the worst time trying to fight off the zombie with my knife that did little to no damage. He was probably a bodybuilder in his past life. The other zombies were fast approaching when I heard three gunshots and saw, as the zombies fell to the floor, Claire Redfield aiming a magnum. She shot my current attacker dead. Or rather, deader than usual. _

"_Thanks," I said as I wiped the sweat and slime off my face. _

"_What's with being trigger-happy?" she asked as she walked towards me, careful of not stepping on the fallen zombies._

"_I wasn't, they were blocking my way," I replied. _

"_I noticed."_

"_You're the one being trigger happy, wasting precious magnum bullets. Do you realize how expensive a round is?" I accused her casually._

"_Would you rather be dead?" _

"_Good point."_

"_Look, this is the last round I got and my bow gun is lodged in a zombie's throat," she admitted. "We better find a way to get out of here and meet the team in the location without the use of guns. The exit is two rooms from here…if you trust my map reading ability, then it's through that door."_

"_Sounds like an adventure."_

"_Something we could do with our eyes closed," she smiled. _

_We started walking through the hall of the Umbrella facility and found the door to be locked. We were trying all the keycards we had gathered, hoping to be able to unlock it. Actually, I was trying the keycards while she stood next to me, telling me of the creatures she encountered on her way here. She didn't sound alarmed at all. She was even talking casually. It was her way of releasing stress and fear. The energy in her voice was enough to calm me. _

"_Hey Leon," she said. I turned to her as I continued trying out the other key cards. "Next time you're in a situation like that, just call me and I'll save ya."

* * *

_

_ClaireClaireClaireClaireClaireClaire. Where are you? Why aren't you here to help me?_

I felt too weak to push hard against the box. I was starting to feel dizzy. All that training to just die in a box. Pitiful. Really.

I was about ready to pass out when light flowed in from above, threatening to drown me. I shielded my eyes from the blinding light that invaded. I was hauled out of the box by the collar. I immediately searched for my gun but it was nowhere on me. The man who freed me opened the other box and hauled Carlos out as well. Carlos collapsed beside me, doing the same thing I did, look for his weapon.

We heard a mocking laugh escape from the man. Carlos and I were too weak to stand up just yet. We doubted we could put up a fight in an instant. The light was blinding us both. We could hardly see his face. "Enjoyed the ride?" he asked tauntingly.

I was too busy trying to inhale as much oxygen to even look at him. Then he laughed again. "Outside," he said sternly before he went out the room, leaving only echoes of his footsteps. The door slammed soundly.

It took me quite a while to regain complete consciousness. Carlos was already examining the room when I stood up. It was filled with cargo boxes. It smelled of gunpowder. There was no other exit save for the one door.

"If we resist, they could blow us to smithereens," Carlos said, shaking his head.

I agreed. I stared at the door for quite some time, wondering what lay beyond. Death? Doubtful. They kept us alive until now, so maybe they're preparing some form of torture before we meet Chris.

"The boss sure knows his business," Carlos murmured.

* * *

"Ready?" Carlos asked, his left hand was on the knob. I nodded. He turned the knob slowly and I prepared for the worse… 

The cool night air whipped through, sending my hair in complete disarray. The place was dark under the starless night sky. There were no swarms of armed guards like we expected. We could see a car in a distance, with a man half-sitting on the hood. He opened his flashlight and aimed it straight to my face. I involuntarily shielded my eyes with my right hand. His figure was strangely familiar.

"You son of a bitch!" I heard Carlos roar as he ran forward. Before it could register, the man dropped the flashlight and I saw Carlos gripping him by his collar. Laughter was heard and I saw the man hold on to his stomach as he laughed hard. He did not seem fazed at all by the fact that Carlos had a tight grip on him and was looking as dangerous as a Hunter.

I stepped forward. There was something wrong here. _Wait…is that…Is that Chris Redfield?_

"It was…joke…should seen…faces," Chris managed to say in between fits of laughter.

I had my temper crossed as well. That was definitely not a funny joke. My eyes narrowed as I felt anger take over the place where worry had been. "Fucking bastard," I muttered as I started forward.

Chris raised both his palms in an attempt to make peace.

"Hold him Carlos," I said as I got my fist ready.

"Hey, will you beat me up in front of my son?" Chris asked, tilting his head to the direction of the car. I looked behind him and saw a little Chris Redfield staring at us with wide innocent eyes through the windshield. Carlos immediately loosened his grip.

"The fuck…you have a son?" was the only thing Carlos was able to say.

"Well, obviously," Chris said. "Release me and I'll take you to my place."

"Just what the fuck were you thinking?" I asked as Carlos took his hands off Claire's brother. "We could have died out there."

Chris started laughing yet again, ignoring the deadly glares we were sending him. "You expect to see me that easy?"

"I wouldn't be surprised if one day you open a box to see a dead visitor."

"Don't worry, you were the only ones subjected to it. You guys must have really pissed Barry off, he asked me to give it to you hard."

I looked at Carlos who gave me a huh-what-did-I-do look. I returned my gaze to Chris. There was a deafening silence; both Carlos and I had our eyes narrowed at the former STARS captain. This might be Chris' type of joke but it was probably the most life-threatening experience I ever had. I had never felt so close to death before. It was just not fair to know that you're dying and that you can't do anything about it.

"Fine, fine…I know it was dangerous to do that and I really scared the shit out of you but heck, you'd be laughing over this as well when the time comes," Chris said.

"Is that your form of apology?" Carlos asked.

"Hey, I was just carrying out Barry's orders…"

"Wait, just who the hell is the boss?" I asked, remembering what our contact told us. I wondered just how much of what was said was true. I should hand it to them however for impeccable acting and realistic set-up.

Chris cocked his head to the side, asking us to follow him. "Come on, I'll introduce you." Chris went to the side of the car and opened the door. He picked up the little man and introduced us as he promised. "Carlos, Leon, this is the boss." The little tyke latched his arms around his father's head and looked away.

"No offense, but that's a fuckin' ugly name," Carlos said.

"Hey! You'll offend him. And his name is Christopher Redfield, Jr.," Chris said proudly as he tried to make the kid look at us to no avail. It seems like Carlos and I weren't the only ones who had our share of fear.

"How old is he?" Carlos asked.

"Two. This is daddy's little bastard right here."

"You married?"

"Yeah, long story. Anyway, my wife's gonna kill me if we don't get home soon, let's move," Chris said as he placed the child back inside the car.

"Where's my gun?" I asked. It was a prized possession. My gun was probably the sole thing that allowed me to sleep soundly at night. The definition of sound sleep, however, was debatable.

"In the trunk."

"Would you mind if we get it now?" Carlos asked.

Chris agreed and opened the trunk. Carlos took his weapons while I took mine. The moment Chris was able to close the trunk, Carlos' punch connected with his cheek. I expected a world war to launch right at that moment. The gods were kind, however. Chris merely touched the sore spot gingerly, shook his head and said, "I guess I deserved that."

Carlos seemed to have reconciled with the built-up emotions he had acquired two minutes ago when he learned that everything was just a set-up. I, meanwhile, was debating whether I should do the same as Carlos. Before I could even decide, Chris turned to me and warned, "forget it Kennedy, you want me on your side."

I decided I needed all the help I can get and so my hands stayed where they were.

There was another long pause. The three of us were looking at each other as if debating whether to hug each other or what. We sure haven't seen each other in a long time. I wasn't even able to recognize Chris in an instant.

"What are you doing, ladies? Get inside the car!."

We were on the road in no time. Chris was driving like a maniac. He sure wanted to get home as fast as he can.

"Who's the missus?" Carlos' voice was laced with curiosity.

"Just someone I bumped into three years ago," Chris answered, refusing to give out any useful information.

"I didn't know you were the marrying type."

"Up to the day I proposed, trust me, I wasn't the marrying type. Leon, didn't Claire tell you about this?"

"She did," I nodded.

"And you didn't tell me?" Carlos turned to me.

"No contact, remember?" I threw his answer back at him, smirking.

He shook his head and turned to Chris again. "You didn't invite me to your wedding. Geez, what happened to being friends?"

"The least I wanted was to have Umbrella people at my wedding. You know I couldn't invite any one of you. We were starting over."

"Yeah, yeah… Wait, does Jill know about this?"

Chris was a bit silent for a moment. "She does," he said softly.

"How does she feel about this? She was really in love with you before you guys disappeared," Carlos' voice was hinted with concern. Carlos was probably Jill's best friend in the group. Of course that's after Chris got promoted from being Jill's best friend to Jill's lover.

Chris sighed. "I guess she's happy for me. She's okay with it, I guess."

Carlos let out a sigh of regret for the former lovers. It just wasn't fair that they would separate because of Umbrella. Umbrella had taken so much from us already.

"Damn Umbrella," Carlos muttered, shaking his head.

I couldn't agree more.

* * *

Chris asked us to be quiet the moment we got to the front door. He told us to keep our mouths shut and he will do all the talking. His wife, as he said, had quite the temper. I heard humming coming from inside, as well as the all-too-familiar sound of a custom gun being assembled. Carlos peeked through the window and saw a brown-haired woman in the living room. 

He turned to me. "Is that…? No, it can't be…"

The door flew open even before Chris could land a knock on the wooden door. "Who told you that you can bring my son to your stupid games!" An angry, dangerously armed woman welcomed her husband. She had a gun dangling from her left hand and her right hand was positioned on the contour of her hip.

Chris squirmed a bit. Carlos was too shocked to say anything. I, on the other hand, already knew who was lucky enough (or unfortunate enough) to become the mother of Christopher Redfield's children. I smiled at the woman and greeted her.

"Hello Jill!"

"What the—Leon? Carlos?" she asked. Then in a matter of seconds, recognition replaced confusion. She welcomed us both with a hug. She ushered us into her home and fed us like kings. Chris, on the other hand, was still in trouble. Jill wasn't at all happy about him taking their son to some faraway woods to open up two boxes with human bodies inside. His leaving his four-month pregnant wife to do so added to the weight of his sins.

Jill insisted we stay the night. Chris had received an email from his sister regarding her whereabouts but refused to share any information with me until _"all scores were settled"_. Carlos and I were to share the guest room. Chris failed to sense the tension between us two. I know I had no sufficient reason to be angry at the merc but since when had emotions ever been logical? I lay in my bed feigning sleep. Carlos snuck out of the room to talk to someone by the doorway. They spoke in cold whispers. I wondered what Chris and Carlos were talking about. Perhaps they were talking about me. Why else would they be whispering?

What was Chris telling Carlos? Of how much he disapproves of me? Of how Claire really wanted to get rid of me? Does he favor Carlos over me?

I was so engrossed with my thoughts that I didn't readily notice that Carlos had gone to bed. I waited for several more minutes before I stealthily stood up and went out the room. I surveyed the surroundings and tried to figure out where Claire's room was. I was able to find it on my second try. I had expected Claire's room to be simple. That was exactly what the room was. It consisted of only a bed, a side table and a dresser. The only indication that it was Claire's room was the cork board filled with photographs on the wall.

What I wasn't expecting, however, was the big brother to be waiting in the room for me. "About damn time," he said, much to my surprise. I closed the door gently behind me.

"Chris," I said flatly.

He stood up. "I won't make this long and hell, I won't be subtle. I never really liked you and even before, I hated the way you would spend almost every hour of your day with my sister in the guise of being a best friend when all those times I knew you had a hidden motive. You've caused her so much pain without even knowing it. Give me a good reason why I should lead you to her to do even more damage?" His voice was cutting and his eyes were fierce and protective.

_What pain?_ I thought. The last time I checked, it was my heart that had been crushed when she left several years ago.

"I never had a hidden motive," I said.

"Who are you kidding, Kennedy? Everyone can see why you were so insistent on being by her side. Everyone knows why you were always acting the good guy. If I didn't know better, I'd think it's love," he said, trying to threaten me with his piercing gaze.

"What if it really is love?"

"No, it's not." He was stern. "If it was love, you would have told her about it and then she wouldn't have been as miserable and frustrated as she had been. You and Claire would have a relationship that would have ended normally. That way, she could move on and forget about you. There would have been closure and you wouldn't have added to her miseries."

_Added to her miseries? Did I really make her miserable?_

"I…I was looking for the right time," I said in a low voice.

Chris scoffed tauntingly. "Right time? When's the right time? Every time we go on a raid, we could die. There is an extremely big possibility that either she or you would no longer walk out of there alive. For someone who could die every week, you've got lots of time to waste."

I had nothing else to defend me. I could never win in his game. I kept silent.

"What, Leon? I'm waiting for a good answer."

I leveled his gaze. "I don't know why you despise me but I really love your sister. I don't care whether you think it's foolish and unreal. I don't care if you help me or not. I don't care whether it will take me a day, a year or a lifetime, I'd find her no matter what," my voice was a bit louder.

"And if you find her, then what? Can you give her the normal life she wants and deserves?"

"Tell me," he stepped forward. "Do you even know her enough to know what she needs?"

"No. The answer is no, but I'm more than willing to learn. She left me, what am I supposed to do?" There was desperation in my voice.

"Don't you dare blame her for any of these. You have no idea what she'd been through!"

_Why are you blaming me for everything? Wasn't it you who dragged her into this first?_

"What do you want me to do, Chris? I'm trying to grab my slim chance but you're taking it away from me."

"You don't deserve her, Leon. Face it. Forget this, just walk away. Let her be," Chris said. "She's already starting over, she doesn't need the complications and the pain you want to give her."

I stood straight. I won't let him tell me such things. I won't let myself believe it nor be discouraged. "Who are you to tell me I don't deserve the woman I love? I did everything I could for her."

"You speak as if you've never done anything wrong. What have you done for her, anyway? Were you really there when she needed you? Can you honestly tell me you've done everything you could for her? Can you?"

_The wall was a plain uneventful white. I had been running into nothing but walls for the last two minutes. I turned around to see the tear-streaked face of Claire Redfield. I was reminded of the anger and disbelief I was feeling a second ago. _

"_Dammit Claire! That's just plain illogical and unreasonable. We can't continue living in your selfish world. Just face it and move on," my words came out biting and accusing._

"_I'm selfish! Fuck you. I've been trying my best here and that's how you see me? I thought you were my—"_

_I grabbed her and shook her a bit. My grip was tight on her arms. "You're no longer a child Claire! It's about time you start thinking like an adult. I'm so tired of your chronic melodramatic bullshit!"_

_She shoved me away. "I hate you," she cried out. "So much."_

_My eyes narrowed and the next words tumbled out of my mouth without my control. "I don't care," my voice was flat._

_Her expression quickly changed. The anger in her eyes mellowed and was soon replaced by pain and disappointment. "Of course you don't…" she bit her lip to keep herself from sobbing violently. _

I couldn't answer. Every time I wanted to say yes, I see Claire's expression and hear her voice as she said those words that day.

Chris sneered. "That's what I thought." He walked past me and made his way to the door. He was about to slam the door when I spoke.

"She loves me."

He stopped on his track.

"Claire loves me. She wouldn't be happy with anyone else. No one else can make her happy," I said.

"You arrogant bastard…"

"You know it. If I don't find her she can never be happy the way she'll be happy with me."

* * *

_The rain came down. Hard. Threatening to drown just with the thickness of its droplets. The vertical downpour pounded my skull, threatening to make cracks. I decided to make a run for it. _

_Europe's weather wasn't normally this fucked up. This city, however, can pretty well be another planet. It rains like crazy in this place all the time. It was sunny when we went out that afternoon. Several hours and a couple of failed attempts to get reliable Umbrella information later, the rain had descended._

_The people wore raincoats. They were prepared for it. Claire and I, however, either being too used to America's weather or just being too stupid or heedless for our own good, did not bring umbrellas nor jackets with us. Needless to say, we were running from one covered place to the next. _

_Not that I minded. This certain part of the city's electricity had gone out and she was holding on to my hand so that we wouldn't lose each other in the black of the night. It took us a third of an hour to realize that we were lost._

_Claire wasn't an expert in navigating with maps. My Italian was as elementary as it could get. I only managed to irritate a drunk and be shooed off by a storekeeper when I asked for directions. _

_I can remember turning to her with a frustrated look on my face. She was soaking wet and she was not at all happy about it. She hugged her shivering self and repeatedly ran her hands through her arms. It was of little use to conserve heat. She kept her back to me. It didn't take me long to notice that her shirt had clung to her body like second skin. _

_I mentally kicked myself for not having had worn a jacket. Of course the thought was not for me. It was approximately one and a half years after our Raccoon City fiasco and it was the time of my overpowering obsession—no, I prefer to call it unrequited and pitifully unmentioned feelings for Claire._

"_What time is it?" she asked, focusing the light of her flashlight over my watch. _

"_10:40," I answered. _

_She sighed. I knew that Chris would be stark mad when we return—that is if we can return. It was pitch black and we were trapped in an empty shed. We refused to brave the rain without any clue as to which direction we should be running to._

_I kept mumbling to myself. _

"_What are you doing?" she asked, probably because she was annoyed by my mumblings._

"_Thinking."_

"_Of what?"_

"_Of what I'll tell Chris later, He'd kill me I'm sure."_

_She chuckled and continued her staring ahead. _

_I was a few steps behind her so she couldn't see me staring at her back. I desperately wanted to reach forward and touch her damp hair. It took all my willpower not to embrace her and share to her slender frame what body heat I still had in me. _

"_I'm sorry we got lost," she broke the silence._

_I shrugged. "It's not your fault."_

"_Do you think Chris is already looking for us?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_He better find us soon coz I'm freezing."_

_That was my cue. Or at least I'd like to think she was sending across a message wanting me to ease the sufferings brought about by the fucked up weather. I reached out, held her arms. She almost jumped at the contact. I pressed my body to hers. _

_She moved away in surprise._

"_What are—"_

_I took my hands off as if I was burned._

"_I'm sorry. I thought you could use some heat. Um, what I meant to say was…well, yeah, heat. I don't have a jacket so I…I just thought…ugh." I stopped my incoherent speech with a sigh. _

_She let out a laugh. She fell silent afterwards as if contemplating something. I was busy scolding myself partly for having had done that and scaring her but mostly because for not having the balls to have gone through with it. I was in the middle of my litany of curses in my head when she turned to me with an embrace. She hooked her arms around my waist and rested her head on my chest._

"_Could use a little warmth."_

_I instinctively wrapped my arms around her—more than glad to be of help. My breathing was as irregular as it could get. So was hers. _

"_Claire…" I managed to hitch out my throat. What better time to tell her? This is it. _

"_Yeah?"_

"_I've got something to tell you."_

"_Hmm?"_

_**Ehem!**_

_Claire turned to the direction where the voice came from. The intense light coming from the flashlight blinded us. It took a few seconds for me to recognize who it was. It took her less time and she immediately stepped away from me upon recognizing the intruder. _

"_Chris!"

* * *

_

A lot of unexpected things had happened. There was Raccoon, there was that call from the CIA. There was also, of course, Chris waiting for me to tell me his hatred last night. And now, there's this head-splitting headache when I woke up.

It was one in the afternoon when I woke up. My head felt like nails had been pounded in. No more late-night daydreaming and reminiscing for me.

I woke up in Claire's room, lying on her bed. I couldn't help but think that it was the same bed where she used to sleep during the nights when I didn't know for certain that it was her I was missing. I half-stumbled my way towards the first floor where I saw Carlos playing with Chris' son. Jill was busy making her house immaculate. She handed me an envelope from Chris, who was nowhere to be found. She said he went to do some business. I didn't pry. Jill did not seem like she wanted to share much information anyway.

I opened the envelope in the veranda. A revolution was still going on inside my head but it had gone bearable when I saw the exact location of Claire written on paper. There was nothing else in the envelope. I wasn't really expecting Chris to write me a letter. God knows why he finally decided to give me Claire's location. He didn't seem like he would be persuaded during our last conversation. When it comes down to it, Chris was the one who was most against us. He tolerated me for the longest time back then because I was his teammate and friend but I have always known that he wouldn't exactly be doing gleeful cartwheels if ever his sister and I got together. It might just be me, being so hateful to his eyes, or it might be the protective brother inside Chris. I couldn't tell.

The only thing stopping me from getting a jet to her place was my not-so-stellar condition. And what will I tell her? Winging it didn't seem like the greatest of ideas.

Why didn't she just wait for me in the first place? She said she feels the same…wait, no…she never said that. She said that she once felt the same. I just assumed that she still …sigh.

I can spend a lifetime just thinking about what we really are. If my feelings for her started out uncertain, hers was even more so. We both tried to play the game safely and now I'm suffering the consequences. You can't play safe with love. You've got to risk a lot of things and not just continuously tiptoe on the boundary of friendship and romantic love. Maybe that was it. We were both afraid to lose the friendship we had. It was a great friendship we shared and we couldn't just risk it by becoming more.

"Beer?" Carlos offered me one.

"Don't you think it's a bit early?"

He shrugged. I took the bottle from him. He sat next to me. He was, however, wise enough to keep an optimum distance between us. I decided that since he was the one who helped me find Chris, and therefore also Claire, I should at least keep it civil with him. I don't have a good reason to be angry with him but since I learned of his thing with Claire, my blood simmers at the sight of him. Given enough time, I know this unduly feeling of hatred would fade.

"Got what you need?" He asked.

"Yeah."

"Great."

I nodded.

"Did Chris give you a hard time?"

"Not really. Why?"

"Just asking."

Silence.

It's amazing how we could stand the awkwardness of the conversation.

"Leon, I've got something to tell you," Carlos started.

His words gave me an unwelcome feeling of awkwardness at the pit of my stomach.

"Claire and I…"

"I told you it doesn't matter." I cut him off.

"But I want you to know. You need to understand."

"Understand what? That I lost? That you got her first?"

Carlos looked at me with a disappointed gaze. "It was never a contest, senor. It's not about who gets Claire first," he said in a low voice.

I wanted to kick him for being so righteous when it comes to Claire. I hated him for saying the right things, for making me doubt that I deserve Claire.

"Then what is it about?"

"It's about getting her at all. You need to understand, what we had, it was never like what you two always had," Carlos looked away. "She didn't love me. I don't think I loved her either."

"Then what was it? You used each other?"

"I don't like to think of it that way. Look at the situation she was in. She was like a fugitive then. She was alone with her brother in a foreign place. She didn't have a friend save for Chris. She needed someone she can trust, she hungered for a companion.

"I came as a person from her past, someone she already trusted. My intentions at the start was just to be the same friend I was back then, but circumstances pushed us to something else. I needed a friend half as much as she needed a reconnection to the past she hastily left. I just happened to be at the right place at the right time. And if there's one thing I know, it's that you should never miss out on a chance to be with a woman like her."

That hit harder and cut deeper than any physical blow. He was right. I never cared to think of the conditions they faced during that time. I just so easily let myself feel betrayed. Carlos was right, it was foolish to miss out on your chance. His words, though enlightening, didn't ease out much of the feelings of pain and anger within me.

"I'm your friend too, Carlos. Didn't you even think of how –" I didn't continue. It was selfish of me to only think of myself. "You're one of my best friends and it just hurts so much that it had to be you."

"I never…" he started but decided not to continue. "Claire and I…we had our moments. Even though I never saw in her eyes what it is that I see whenever she looks at you. Even though I often wondered whether it was you she imagines whenever we kiss. Even though at times I feel like I move in your shadow…it doesn't matter. I'm thankful for what we had and even if you will never forgive me, I don't regret a thing. I helped her, she helped me. She made my life a lot better in those few months we were together. She's a wonderful person, Leon, if you find her, never let her go."

"I won't," I muttered. "Not ever."

"Then good. That's how it's supposed to be. Leon and Claire, perfect for each other. Just like old times."

"Just like always…"

* * *

"_When the blue light in your watch beeps, you've got approximately ten minutes to secure the passage to the pick-up point. Jill, we're counting on you not to be toast.," Chris was reviewing the team regarding the designations. _

_We were minutes away from another raid. Barry was driving, while the rest of the team was making sure everything we needed were secured and strapped. I turned to Claire who was staring blankly ahead. Her knuckles were turning white because of her tight grip on her gun. _

"_She will be alright," I told her. Sherry was alone in the safe house. We needed all our men to be in this raid. When we come back, if ever we do, I would have to bring her to her aunt in South America. She couldn't stay with us. Sherry deserves a normal life. _

_Claire nodded but my words didn't ease her worries one bit. Claire had always treated Sherry as if she were her daughter. _

"_Are you afraid?" I asked._

_She nodded. "Very much."_

_I touched her hand and her grip on her weapon lightened. She looked at me, her blue eyes still tainted with worry, fear and helplessness. This was Claire, she had faced all forms of evil thinkable, but even through everything, her heart remained unhardened. _

_Thoughts came racing through my mind. The answers were starting to appear. The uncertain feelings became all clear now. _

_Just like that, looking into her almost teary eyes, I fell in love with Claire Redfield.

* * *

_

The worst part was waiting. It had always been. I sat quietly on the couch, her couch. She might kill me for intruding her place but I'd take my chance.

I didn't bother open the lights. Fire burned at the flick of my thumb. Then with a flick of my wrist, it was gone. I repeated it over and over again, admiring the warm shine it had on the metal of the lighter. How Claire's lighter got to my bag four years ago, I'd never know. All that mattered was it was there and it was a reminder Claire left me of her existence before she disappeared with her brother.

She would come home soon. I cannot believe I was just minutes away from seeing her face again, from touching her skin, from feeling her warmth.

Excitement powered my pulse. I never knew I could still smile like this.

The rustling at her door alerted me. She's home. I stood up and quietly made my way to her small kitchen. If I'm lucky, it would take her a minute to realize someone else was in the apartment with her. I was situated between the refrigerator and the oven, breathing as silently as if I wasn't even there.

She got in and took her---no, **my** jacket off. I could only see her silhouette but still, seeing her took my breath away. I felt like I have waited for this for a lifetime. The sudden change in her movements signaled that she knew she wasn't alone.

Before I could even release a breath, she had turned around and a gun was already pointed my direction. I took a step forward.

"Don't move!" she said sternly.

I took another step. She released the gun's safety.

"Who are you?"

I smiled. I flicked my thumb and soon the flame from the lighter gave light, revealing my identity.

_S_he slowly put the gun down when she recognized me. I stood in my place, admiring her from a distance.

"Leon…"

Her lips moved to whisper my name and for me, it sounded as loud as a gunshot on a peaceful uneventful day.

One second she was there standing several paces in front of me and the next she had the distance between us covered. Before I could utter a word, her lips were on mine, wiping away every word I planned to say. I kissed back with as much passion. My hands instinctively wrapped around her.

I squeezed her, assuring myself that this was real. Then, my right hand traveled to the back of my neck where she was holding me. I took the gun from her hand all the while ravaging her soft lips. I tossed the gun as softly as I can towards the couch.

She pulled back. "I'm sorry," she said in a remorseful voice. I felt alarm shoot up my spine at her words.

_Sorry? Why? Are you going to leave again?_

I was about to protest when she kissed me again, this time, pushing me until I hit the wall. Then I realized what she meant. She didn't need to apologize for leaving, the moment she uttered my name, she was forgiven.

She pulled away again and stared at me. She didn't do anything but look at me, studying me intently. I wasn't sure whether she was looking for something or she just wanted to take a good look.

"What is it?" I asked.

She shook her head before I seized her lips for another kiss. And this kiss went on and on, longer than I had expected. My hands started roaming. So did hers. Our tongues dueled. I kissed her almost fervently, letting out the desires that I had repressed for so long. Her skin was soft and smooth under my touch. I don't think I could keep my hands off her if I tried. I could feel her hands underneath my shirt. It sent shivers. And these shivers, I decided, were very much welcome.

I was like a kid opening a long-awaited present. No, it wasn't a robot this time or the remote-control car I begged my father to give me. This was much grander. This was a gift I would never even deserve in ten lifetimes. This was Claire Redfield, the woman I cry, laugh and breathe for.

Soon, I found myself shirtless while she, on the other hand, was not exactly topless but getting there. My hands roamed her body as our lips interlocked. She closed her eyes and when they opened, she was the one whose back was pressed on the wall.

"Bedroom," she panted for air.

Soon, we were walking. Well, not really walking. We were, let's say, stumbling our way to her bedroom. It would have been a lot easier if I just lifted her up, but Claire didn't want to be carried. We both fought for control.

She grimaced in pain when her hip hit the doorknob of her bedroom door. We were careless, haphazardly throwing each other to the nearest wall or furniture on our way to her room. I apologized by ravaging her neck with my kisses. She got back at me by exchanging our positions (without my full consciousness) so that I was the one leaning on the door. She suddenly opened it and I fell on my back. I pulled her with me though and soon we were making out on the floor.

Years of unresolved sexual tension, finally on its way to being resolved.

When I woke up the next morning, I was on her bed and she was sleeping serenely beside me. I pulled her closer to me, enjoying her warmth. She was facing away so I just planted soft kisses on her back. She moved a bit and grunted something about now being too early. She fell back asleep in no time.

I smiled as I rested my head against the contour of her nape. She smelled lovely. I recalled the events of last night and couldn't help but grin. Everything seemed to have happened so fast. One moment she had a gun aimed at me, the next we were almost naked on the bedroom floor.

If I think about it, last night was based mostly on primal desires. It made me wonder if it was just a casual uneasing of the overwhelming sexual tension we had in years. What made it any different from the other similar deeds I had done? I was even gentler with other women. What made it any different from what Claire and Carlos had shared? Am I sure that she also had the feelings I had or was it just another night for her? Was it fueled by lust or love? Or was it something else?

Then I recalled how Claire held on to me afterwards, of how she was like a child seeking comfort. She didn't even bother pull the covers to herself then, she just held on to me tightly, smiled and let her head rest on my shoulder. She pulled extremely close, afraid to let go. There was something about the smile she gave me then. It was thankful, happy, bitter and loving all at the same time. It said a thousand things and the real meaning behind it was unfathomable.

"Stay with me," I whispered to her. She stirred a bit. "Did you hear me, Claire? Stay with me. You'd never have to run away again."

I was rewarded with her even breathing.

"I'll make everything safe. We can have a home together. You don't have to leave. Not ever. You know how I feel, right? I won't let you walk away without me ever again. Be my Claire … and I'll give you normalcy."

She turned to me then, almost teary-eyed but beaming with a smile. "I thought you'd never ask." She reached a hand to touch my face. "Thank you, Leon. Thank you for finding me."

"Every mile was worth it," Every minute was worth the wait.

I kissed her before she settled into my embrace again and closed her eyes. I settled my head above hers, relishing the steady rhythm of her breathing. The overwhelming feeling I had in my chest was now more bearable than ever. I don't know what the future will bring. I do not have answers to all my questions. I cannot assure her that everything will be alright. There was no certainty that we could ever reach normalcy.

Everything could change in a snap, but for now, I am here with the one I love and I'm going to enjoy every second of it.

"I love you…" I whispered to the sleeping woman in my arms. Remembering her smile last night made me realize that I didn't need her to tell me to know that I have my place in her heart as well.

**The End.

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Thank you for reading. I'm going to add a bonus chapter soon, so watch out for that.

If you're going to flame the fic, make it a bit constructive and don't give me reasons saying it sucks just because you don't like certain pairings.

Anyway, thanks for reading! Please leave a constructive review.


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